Don't Bother getting on my last nerve...it's pinched.

Two weeks ago I woke up with a kink in my neck.  Combine that with a typical day in the life of a Rockstar Mom and I quickly developed a tight knot in the left shoulder.  This led to a screaming headache.  The pain began to radiate down my left arm and this is where I turned into a savage bitch.

I put out a plea for help on Facebook.  Among my 450+ friends are a couple of Chiropractors, a couple of nurses, a medical assistant and a half a dozen Massage Therapists, and a couple other random folks who like to fancy themselves "Medical Professionals" based on their experience of previously diagnosing a neighbor's hamster with erectile disfunction.

I had an appointment at a friend's chiropractic clinic within 24 hours of my health insurance being verified. That day I was x-rayed, adjusted, hooked up to an electroshock machine and given a short trigger point massage.  The young man doing the trigger point massage put his hands on my shoulders and said something along the lines of "Girl! You are SO tight!"  It was at this moment that I choked on my saliva.  For about two hours, I had complete relief.  And then the pain returned with a vengeance.

I woke up this morning with numbness in my left thumb and pointer finger.  This caused me to drop my coffee and prevented me from blow drying or styling my hair.  I settled for a frumpy dark blue headband that now, six and a half hours into this God forsaken day, I realize does not match my sky blue t-shirt.

I called my friend at the Chiropractor's office and fought back tears as I asked to be seen again ASAP.  She got me an appointment within two hours.

I saw a different Chiropractor today and this guy actually sat down and looked over my x-rays with me.  The good news is my bone quality is good.  The bad news is, my alignment resembles that of a jackknifed rig.

He gave me another adjustment, I had trigger points done yet again (with another comment about being tight...Is it wrong that I feel a little flattered?) and I spent 10 minutes hooked up to the electro shock machine with moist heat on my neck.  This treatment needs to continue for a period of 90 days and relief will not come immediately.

Just.shoot.me.now.

I have another appointment day after tomorrow.  And I am sitting here fighting off tears because:

A. I am in pain.
B. I am tired.  I can sleep only in increments of three hours before I wake up in pain.
C. I don't know how I am going to pay for this. The Bug has some extensive doctor bills of her own going on right now, and my JackWagon Ex is currently sitting at $1966.67 in arrears on his child support with the date of his last sent in payment, according to the Attorney General of Texas, being February 10, 2011.

And I am due any day now, so um, yeah.  Tears are imminent.  I spent the weekend grunting with each move, bitching incessantly, smelling like a tube of Bengay with a moist heat heating pad, a moist microwave heated rice filled knee sock, slung over my left shoulder.  A real prize, I tell ya.  Shark wouldn't even look at me, much less claim me as the woman he exchanged vows with just three short years ago.

I just have to know things are going to improve at some point.  Please.

Because right now, death seems more and more inviting.